Mia's pov:

Loud sound of thunder and incessant strong rain made me open my eyes and I squirmed in my place, seeing darkness still surrounding the sky, dark clouds visible from the window.

I felt tired. Very tired!

Someone tucked the blanket draped over me and all tiredness flew out the window as I realised I was not alone in the bed.

"Mia" Strong pair of arms encircled my waist, pulling me closer. My mind was still half asleep until those masculine hands rubbed against my bare stomach, going slowly above to settle on my chest.

Bare chest! Over my bare breasts!

I was lying with my back to that person but I didn't dare to turn around!

Oh my god!

Let it be anyone else, but not him!

No, No! Not anyone else!

But not him either!

Gulping down my panic, slowly I turned around to see worst fears of my life coming true.

There he lay asleep, Jake, in the peak of its beauty, his hairs ruffled to the side while he cuddled with me like a bear.

His hand on my breast moved up and his fingers brushed along my neck, going down again to pull me flush against him by my waist.

My heartbeat quickened it's pace to remember all those passionate moments we shared just some hours ago but my mind was contemplating each wrong touch as a loosening rope of bands holding our friendship together.

Immediately, I rushed away from bed in panic to collect my belongings and run away from him as far as possible.

I knew it was a big mistake.

For him!

But not for me!

*****

MATURE CONTENT!

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"Are you a virgin!?" he whispered huskily, his hands caressing my bare breasts, while his tongue licking my throat up to my lips, licking them slightly only to delve his tongue deeper into my mouth. He bit my upper lip gently, nibbling on it.

His other hand traveled down my chest to cover my other breast, his thumb playing with my hardened peak before pinching them hard making me moan out loudly.

"Yes! Ahhh Yes! I'm.. a ....virgin, Jake mmmmm!"

He growled in satisfaction as his hand trailed down my stomach to settle over my lacy black panties which was soaked wet with my juices now.

He stared at my face flushed with embarrassment and pleasure, my eyes half-lidded with love, desire and lust for him as he rubbed his two fingers over my panty covered womanhood while I shrieked and squirmed beneath him.

Kissing me hard, needy, rough and demanding, he moved down to take one of my swollen nipples in his mouth, his other hand rubbing slowly against my wet clothed core.

"Mmm..mmmm!"

He continued rubbing his fingers against my core, making me go unbelievably wet as my juices started flowing down my thighs to seep into the sheets.

"No.. Ahhh!"

Pulling my panty aside, he lifted my thighs up to lift my lower body up before with a single flick, I was deprived of the last piece of cloth which had shielded my innocence all this time.

Dark blush adorned my cheeks as I felt cold wind tingle my naked skin just as certain hard aristricatic body once again engulfed me.

His lips pressed against mine yet again, his kisses growing more hot and needy while his hands massaged my bare breasts ruthelseely. I writhed and arched my back against him while he continued to touch me wherever his hands could go and explore.

"You're beautiful, Mia! So much beautiful than I could ever deserve to treasure as mine forever!"

His lips found mine in a searing passion and force, and I wondered whether he would kiss me like that too the next day we woke up.

I knew it was all alcohol, emotions, desire, lust and sex for him.

But it meant so much to me!!

The reason I was allowing myself to get touched by him wherever he could touch me, was because I wanted to remember his each and every touch, kisses and sweet nothings he would give me willingly.

I wanted to test whether what I felt for him was a strong love like Emily had for Edward or it had just been a mere attraction all along!

I knew I was being ridiculous, convincing myself to get used by him as one of his whores but if ten years of loving him unconditionally and from afar is not what they called love, then maybe I was just attracted towards him!

His thumb grazed over my hardened peaks, pinching and pressing them before going under my thighs to rub over my virgin flesh.

I cried out his name in pure bliss and pleasure as he inserted his long finger inside my throbbing core, moving it slowly in and out. My walls constricted against his finger, making my heart and body grow hot and needy. His tongue invaded my mouth again, kissing me hard and senseless while he continued to pump his finger in and out.

He joined another finger in, covering my moans with his hot lips and opening his mouth to nip and kiss my jaw, cheeks and nose. I continued to whisper his name when I screamed his name louder just as he joined third finger in his ordeal.

His breath still reeked of pure alcohol, but he continued to kiss me, his teeth taking my upper lip in between.

Something weired and hot was moving in my stomach and my body, just as he pressed his hand further against my clit, increasing speed of his fingers.

"Ja..ke, I think ..mmm something is gonna mmmm come... I am suddenly feeling hot... mmmmmm ahhhh!"

"Let it come! Come for me! Come for your love, Mia!"

"I... I. Mm" Jake opened his mouth against me to kiss me with force, nudging my lips apart to plunge his tongue smoothly into my mouth.

I came hard and fast, a minute later, my slick and thick feminine juices coating his fingers. I turned my head to the side to hide my emabarrassment, but Jake put his hands on my chin to make me look up at him.

He stared at me for some time. His green eyes turned into dark shade of green, hours ago, but they were now shimmering with pure lust. My lips parted in anticipation, seeing his jaws clenched tight, his eyes looking at me with admiration and satisfaction.

His own mouth opened slightly, both of us panting hard. I could feel his bare chest pressing against my own bare breasts, it's mere feeling making my mind go ballistic. He was still wearing jeans, his big erection pressed against my thighs and I found myself getting more and more wet, seeing his eyes boring beautifully into mine as if he was finding answers of his own unknown questions.

I didn't know for how long we stayed like this, just staring at each other although my virgin mind was kicking my butt hard, screaming to me this fact everytime that I was lying all naked beneath the man who would never look at me or at my heart again, the moment he would get what he wanted from me.

My body!

Hot sex which he lived for all this time!

But the question was critical now!?

Was this sex worth my every year of crush, like, love or feelings for him!?

Was it a better option giving away my virginity and my inncoennce to someone who was habitual of taking it everyday from every other girl he found willing!?

Was my body the only thing he wanted now!?

In between our crazy immature fights and pranks, did he never realise I was actually in love with him all this time!?

Even today, when he came to save me heroically from James, was he saving me from that devil, just as a friend!?

Or he actually cared for me more than he showed me everyday!?

But the main question was, did he really hate me!?

Did he never felt anything for me!? All in our twelve years of friendship, was I just a common country girl for him, with whom he could fight, play pranks on, tease her, play with her!?

Did he never, even for just a better erroneous momemt, think that I could actually be a part of his future!?

He lowered his face to mine but when I thought he was going to kiss me, he pressed his forehead against mine, closing his eyes slowly as if closing his eyes to contemplate some tough decision of his life.

What did he need to think of!?

He hated me with every fibre of his being just as I loved him with every last nerve of my body!

So why not just take me!?

Why wait so much!? Take me hard and fast, violate me and destroy me!

Show me how much you hate me!

I am all ready to be manipulated!

If this was the end of every pain I got while seeing you spending your time with someone else, then don't wait anymore!

I am all ready to end it right then and there!

I felt his hands trailing slowly up my body, passing my thighs, my core, my stomach, my bare breasts where he pressed his palms tightly once more over my red swollen nipples before his hands reached my face to cup my cheek gently.

Was he this gentle with every women he spends his night with!?

I know maybe he was but I couldn't care anymore!

It's not that he was ever mine to begin with!

"Mia" My name rolled out of his mouth like a music played in heaven and I just wanted to pull him down and kiss him hard and senseless but I was afraid he might reject me or push me back.

"Mia, listen I....", he trailed off, his eyes searching words in my eyes to complete his sentence.

But he didn't complete his sentence.

I raised my hands which were gripping the bedsheet, to touch him gently on his cheek before cupping his face fully.

He flinched slighly at my touch. I saw the dark raging dilemma in his eyes, obvious fear of losing his friend if he took me right now, but the naked lust of not wanting to stop either.

But I had already taken my decision.

Some tough decision it was, I had to admit!

"Jake" I whispered, tears pooling in my eyes, my lips actually trembled while I called his name.

He centered his attention towards mine, looking at me this time with desire, passion and....

Longing!?

"Take me, Jake" I whispered slowly to him.

His eyes widened slightly, as if he never thought I would say something like that.

"Mia-"

"I have made my decision! Take me now, Jake and let us all be free from whatever that is between us, for once and for all!"

"But-"

"Isn't that what you wanted all along!? To be inside of me!? To touch me like you want to!?"

"I-"

"I'm all yours for now! Do whatever you want to do with me!"

"No-"

I didn't let him complete, pulling him towards me and smashing my lips against him. He remained still for a moment, blinking at me before moving his hands to cup my cheek and kiss me back.

Next thing I knew, he was digging his teeth in my throat, licking my neck, my collarbone, kissing my chest, trailing open hot mouthed kisses down my whole body.

He grabbed my ankles, nudging my thighs apart. My hands attempted to cover myself, suddenly too self-consciousness of my body, but he clutched my wrists, shooking his head at me.

"Don't hide anything from me! It's the only thing I hate when you start hiding things from me!"

I was reluctant in doing that, but my eyes closed in pleasure as he pressed his soft lips over my bare thighs. I inhaled deeply, feeling and reveling in the emotion which was growing inside the pit of my stomach.

His soft kisses turned into open mouthed ones, licking and biting my thighs making me grow more wet when he reached my wet core, placing soft gentle kiss over it.

"Jak..e mmm!"I moaned his name loudly, when he snaked out his tongue to lick my wet folds, opening his mouth to suck on them. My thighs pressed together in impulse but Jake gripped them firmly to put them over his head.

He plunged his finger into my core, joining another in and one more before lapping up my juices like a man deprived of water in a desert for months.

I put one hand over my mouth to muffle my loud moan, while he continued to eat me up, his tongue going deeper in my core, exploring my walls. His fingers were pumping me in and out continuously, licking every bit of my juices coming out.

I bit my lips and my head fell back in pure pleasure as I reached my orgasm second time in a day.

"Jake!!!"

My eyes rolled back my head, my heartbeat racing wild as more and more of my orgasmic juices spilled out.

I was breathing heavily when I was completed with my effort, while he took his time, licking and devouring my juices.

He towered over me once again. Seeing him look all handsome and unapproachable, I turned my head to the side, unable to stand the thought of going all one night stand with my unrequited love.

He frowned a little, cupping my cheeks and turning me around to look at him.

"Look at me. Look at me properly while I take you here and make you all min-", he stopped suddenly, his eyes looking confused at his own words.

I nodded at his words. He sighed.

"Are you-"

"I am all ready, Jake! Don't play all gentle with me! Fuck me like you do with all your other girlfriends! I couldn't care less!"

"Mia-"

"Please Jake! Don't give me false hopes!"

I knew he wouldn't remember a thing after he would wake up in the morning.

He was always like this. Emily was always a strong hater of drinking, the reason Edward never goes off bars. But no matter how much habitual Jake is to alcohol, his ability to forget things happened after drinking alcohol, never disappeared even after all these years.

He tried to argue me out of my wrong notion but I knew how men get emotional after having hefty drinks!

******

I heard his soft groan reach my ears, just as I was picking up my bra and top from the ground. I panicked, running around to grab spare blanket from the nearby cupboard.

*******

His gentle words kept playing in my mind when he was about to enter me, "This is gonna hurt so much, Mia!"

"I know. I know. I read all about it. Just go on!"

He sighed before grabbing my hands and wrapping them around his back.

"Grab me tightly. Scratch me, bite me, kick me for any pain I might give you unintentionally!"

He looked at me for an answer but I just nodded at him.

I wasn't about go and tell him how much I was touched by his words! I know I am a fool to always fall head over heels in love with him for his each and everything but he didn't need to know all that!

He grabbed both my wrists, pinning

me to the bed gently before interwining our fingers and entered me slowly.

And then a fast thrust.

I wouldn't lie if I said it didn't hurt a bit.

It hurt like hell and Jake stopped even in a middle to check me all up but I urged him to go on.

"I am so sorry Mia! Forgive me for all this pain!"

Yes. Yes. I deserved a sorry after all these years, you dumbfuck!

He kissed me and my tears, penetrating me yet again and I muffled my moan only to be kissed hard and passionately by him again.

He increased his pace, kissing my lips, my jaw, corner of my mouth, tip of my nose before nibbling gently on my earlobe.

Our fingers were still interwined and it was fluttering my heart in the most craziest way as possible!

He grabbed my thighs, thrusting me faster and harder, placing his forehead against mine.

Putting my left thigh over his head quickly, he increased his thrusts with a force, whispering my name in between.

We both reached our peaks one at a time. He fell above my chest, all tired from the effort and maybe alcohol.

*End of mature content*

While I just remembered saying one thing to him at last when he fell asleep beside me, pulling me closer, soft snores coming from his nose.

"I love you, Jake" I whispered, running my hands along his cheeks"I don't know why I am telling you this after all these years, but I just felt like I should tell you. You deserve to know what I feel, though I never deserved to be in your arms, let alone in your future!!"

I knew I would regret it the moment I would wake up, and I knew he would regret it too.

But before we both lose whatever existed between us all these years, I picked up my last clothing, wearing it properly, combing my hairs with a little difficulty.

It was hurting like volcano between my thighs and I was pretty sure I wouldn't be able to walk down all the way to my home like this.

Clock showed 4 am and it was still too early for anyone to wake up in this hour.

I knocked bedroom door of Jake's grandparents!

Sighing in relief that his grandmother came out, I quickly hugged her in emotions, slightly staggering in pain.

"Dear. What happened!? Why are you limping? Are you hurt!? Did Jake do anything!?"

Tears started to wet the carpet as I told her everything that happened between us. I just thought hiding it this much would make me go mad in a minute.

"Oh dear! You two-"

"I know. I know. I am so sorry. Please forgive me! I feel ashamed now!"

"But dear-"

"Can you do me a favour? Just one favour!?"

She looked at me with pity and affection.

"Yes Dear! Ask anthing!"

I hesitated a bit. "Call your servants to have him all dressed up!"

"Wha-"

"Yes. Please. I don't want him to know anything that had happened between us. It's all in past and I never want it to come in between our future, if we ever had one!"

"But dear, it's injustice to him!"

"Believe me, it's the best for both of us! Besides, he wouldn't remeber anything anyways! So I don't want to leave any clues behind!"

"And where will you be going now, dear? It's too late at night! You shouldn't-"

"I'm all safe and will always be!"

"But where are you going? Tell me the name of the place-"

"I can't! I'm going far away from my past! From everything now!"

I hugged her shocked form tightly. "I'll miss you so much!"

"Mia dear-"

"Remember you called me something last summer! Your daughter! Then please, please" I placed my hands over hers,"please never tell him anything about all this. It's my last request to you!"

"Dear-"

"Can you not scold him much for bringing over new girlfriends daily? He doesn't like it when you do all that? If he wants to live life his way, let him do it! Trust him better! Believe me, as much as I know, he isn't actually a bad person! He is just moody and maybe spoiled a little!"

"Are you saying goodbye this soon dear? Didn't you love him once!?"

"I told you I am going away from my past. For better and for best! Goodbye!"

I turned around abruptly on my heels and fled outside before any reason could stop me from walking forward

and leaving him behind, tears flew continuously out of my tired eyes while I just wondered if Jake would even care I left without saying a proper goodbye to him...

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